“The most dangerous people are always smart, impressive and attractive.”
- Malcolm McDowell
How do you know that the person you are having dinner with at a nice restaurant is a good person or a dangerous narcissist? Or how do you know for sure that a co-worker who gets along with everyone else at work is actually not a nice person at all? Most of us think that it is easy to distinguish between a good person and a dangerous person, but identifying a dangerous person is not really that simple, a dangerous person does not reveal their evil side clearly, so these are the people who end up hurting others the most.
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| signs you're dealing with a dangerous narcissist |
They portray themselves as great people who want the best for you, but behind that mask, there are a lot of toxins.
So today we ask: How do you really know that you are dealing with a dangerous person? You should look for some signs that reveal the true face of others, and help you understand who you are really dealing with.
Look out for these hidden signs, so you can protect yourself from poisonous and dangerous machinations and games.
1. Drama follows them wherever they go
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| narcissistic drama |
It's as if the drama was made for them. No matter where they are, what they do or who they meet, the drama somehow finds its place. They either start the drama or instigate the drama or find themselves in the middle of the drama, no matter the situation, they are somehow involved in it.
They are experts at controlling situations, especially if it is causing problems in your social circle. Making peace is never an option for them, and the moment they see everything is okay they will try to spoil it.
Creating problems between people is their favorite pastime, and drama is what they do best.
2. Deception is their favorite game
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| deception |
Dangerous people are experts at deceiving others, and they know exactly how to behave with others so as not to expose themselves. They will deceive you unknowingly to meet their own needs, and if you tell them to, they will give you a million excuses and you will think that you are mistaken in thinking that they are deceiving you.
They will have a repertoire of excuses and justifications for their deceptive actions, and they will never admit their mistakes, and they will be so good at it that the truth will not be known until it is too late. And if they admit their games, they will show no remorse for them and will be cold, defensive and stubborn, and will act as if they have done nothing wrong.
3. They have many outstanding issues
When you have stuck issues festering inside of you, you don't want to experience them alone and when you criticize people you will feel better for a few minutes.
When there is a lot of pain inside you you will feel anger at the whole world and that is exactly what a dangerous person feels. They have so much pain, anger, and bitterness inside, that they cannot bear to see anyone else happy. If they are suffering, everyone around them must suffer, too.
Instead of dealing with their feelings or trying to process them, they choose to focus on hurting people. Everything will look fine until you do or say something about their unresolved problem that you don't know about.
When this happens, you will discover their negativity and resentment, and their unhealed wounds will continue to torture them from within and this leads them to torment others outside.
4. Taking responsibility is a strange concept to them
One of the biggest hints that you are dealing with a dangerous person is the fact that they never take responsibility for their actions, no matter how despicable they are, if you confront them and try to hold them responsible, they will simply deny everything and may turn it on you.
Even if you hold evidence of their error before their eyes, they will come up with some sort of justification for your opposition. No matter what they do, it's always someone else's fault. Anyone but them.
5. They like to share your secrets in public
A dangerous person is very insecure on the inside and public confrontation makes him feel powerful. Treating things with dignity and solving personal problems in private is not something he believes in.
He likes to broadcast private and embarrassing secrets in public and doesn't care about the consequences at all. If he has a problem with someone, instead of talking to them in private, he will confront them in a public place and create a bad situation.
Dangerous people do this because they are unable to have a healthy discussion with someone, and they are too afraid of being vulnerable. The only way to solve your problems with someone is to open up and talk to them about your feelings and thoughts, but dangerous people hate doing that. Their ego is so bad that they'd rather create a scandal and make the situation worse than open up and talk about what's bothering them.
Healthy conversations, open dialogue, and consideration of others' opinions are problem-solving factors. But unfortunately, they refuse to do things this way and continue to complicate their problems even more.
6. They care a lot about what other people think of them
If you see someone who is very anxious and focuses on their physical appearance and how others view them in an exaggerated way, then they are probably a dangerous person. People who care a lot about what other people think of them always have something to hide that makes them feel insecure.
A Dangerous Person works hard to make sure others see them as perfect and puts a lot of effort into their physical appearance, making sure everything looks perfect on the outside because they want to appear smart and cute (even though they're not!).
Such people are so obsessed with how others perceive them that harmless jokes make them feel like someone is making fun of them, trying to make them look bad.
Although it is not always possible to tell a dangerous person from the average person, these subtle tips can help you. Dealing with a dangerous person is very stressful mentally and emotionally, but once you understand the dangerous person you must cut all ties with them because staying will hurt you, and you will be fine in the long run.
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